101031

사랑한단 말 못해

101022

Sometimes, I know we are feeling the sadness from the bottom our hearts.

No matter how, we have to accept the changes, the reality.

People around us are always not the same.

Neither me.

When I think to run away from somethings, but in fact somethings would run away from me too.

I forgot it's not only about you, but both sides.

If I'm telling you that I'm not feeling sad, it's a lie. =)

Lies do help a lot of people to feel good, but I didn't want to lie on myself.

From the bottom of m heart, I felt the abandoning, not from friends, I mean from some situations?

I really don't know how to explain but I hope it will leave me soon.

I don't want to have the bad(?) mood continues with me, it doesn't make the situation good but it will be getting worst.

I pray, and pray and pray again.

Hope the negative minds would be gone as soon as possible.

I ignored the feeling;

I ignored the happiness occurred because I'm not involved, but I have to be happy because of the happiness occurred.

I'm pretty sure no one understands for the previous sentence, but it's enough for myself.

People, you will be too selfish if you are not allowed others to be happy without you.

Wash your face, take a rest, refresh yourself, everything will be new and good!

God bless.

100829

You know what?

The one I hate most is human;

But the one I love most is still human.

I know it's contradicting with each other but you can't deny that human are so lovely sometimes.

I smiled when I typed these sentences.

I've been emotional for few times these days.

Not to say what, but I'm feeling sorry to my friends, maybe they knew or maybe they don't.

I don't care? Honestly, I'm not feeling care whether they know the reason or not because this is my personal feeling and I know this is such a selfish thinking.

There is reason, too.

This is why I hate human so much.

People know your feeling easily but they do not comfort you because they think you're naive.

People do not know you feeling but they will say somethings that hurt you without realising because they think you're strong and mature enough to accept their words.

All about dignity.

I'm sure the people around me knew that I have strong dignity.

Maybe they think I don't as I act like not caring for everything.

I can tell you how poor am I, how dramatic is my family but I didn't give the permission to you and say about me.

This is my deadline, I know but people don't know.

Sometimes, I blamed.

But I know if I let the negative feeling continuously controlling me, I'm sure I'm dead before giving chance in judging me.

I love to be human, honestly, I love to be a smart human but I know I'm not.

When people around me started to tell me: Don't say like that, you're smart, you just need to work hard.

Hey, guys.. I was actually wanted to say: Bullshit! You are actually looking down at me in your mind but as my friend, you need to give me a faith.

Don't deny it. The people in this world are just so realistic.

I learned about this, how long time ago? I don't know.

However, you gotta thanks these people.

Because of them, you can keep on challenging, until the day you success and prove to everyone: Yes, I did it.

The world actually say that: So what? People took the chances before you success.

And you will feel like: Ow, I'm too late.

And then people encourage you again: It's not too late, you still can fight for it.

And you will start your engine again and say to yourself: Yes, I'm still continuing in fighting my war.

All in all, human is such a nice beautiful word.

They fail us, they encourage us.

They make us cry, they make us smile.

They make us angry, they make us calm.

They make us disappointed, they give us hope in the future.

Am I speaking in a subjective way?

Perhaps. But obviously, this is PERSONAL BLOGGING.

And if you're not agree with me, just get your ass out of my blog, sorry to remind you in my last sentence of this blog post, and yes I'm purposely. =)

100824

I'm in a mess situation now.
Supposed I should know how to do the questions perfectly but I can't do at all.

In other way, I comfort myself by saying: If I know how to do then I won't be a repeater.

When I keep on comforting myself, I feel so helpless and useless.

Am I in the right path?

People keep on moving forward, and once again I face the stress of stepping backward.

Or maybe it is not a backward, but just standing the the point that you have stood for long time, non even move a little small step.

I don't wish to give up FINANCE, I know how useful is it and I need it much.

But if I'm not doing well on it but still holding it tightly, this shows greedy of me and I should just GIVE UP!

But, it's too early to say give up, isn't it?

Not even comes the Quiz 1, and it's tomorrow.

Maybe I'm just too nervous on it.

I can even feel my testiness and impatient just now.

Maybe my friends will feel it through my words, but I didn't mean to do so.

People thought I'm so relaxing even though the quiz is just on tomorrow but maybe I'm just too good in acting? Who knows?

I missed someone's voice and I know I won't hear it for now.

I miss her singing, really.

But in fact, I just know her for 2 months, I guess. XD

I think her voice was just too impressed me.

And I am just able to play the song that she sang before at the KTV to calm me down. =(

Hey, girl.

We'll grab a chance and meet with you again ya.

But, hearing that you will come over Miri next year.

Or I might go over your place the year end, who knows?

Haha.. anyways, you are impossible to read my blog and still, I wanna say: Nice to meet you, truthfully.

100817

I'm just wondering sometimes.

What kind of Uni life is the best?

Socializing? Gathering? Clubbing? Partying? Or just being at home. LOL

I have 8am class, later.

I gotta wake up at 6.45am because I'm grabbing the 7.10am bus.

Honestly, I feel like wanna skip, but skipping for no point.

Sleep, maybe.

I have few number of friends are just started their Uni life.

Reading their blogs, seeing their status in facebook or some twitted in twitter.

Um.. What can I say?

They probably lost themselves in a world that full with attraction, new world for them by the way.

Ow~ One of my friends joined the "30 hours Hunger" campaign.

My first thought was: Paying money to make yourself suffer. No offense.

My second thought: After I earn money, I wanna fly to South Africa (or other places that need my help) and take care of some children or maybe donate some daily stuffs by myself.

Why? Because I was inspired by a guy from Strong Heart (100810 Episode).

My third thought: If I want to experience the same things with those poor kids, I rather do it in the place together with them.

Seriously, I personally think this is a good campaign as it allowed us to know the feeling of hunger and helpless for that moment.

All of us are growing under a good environment, food eating whenever you want: Maggie is the worst or spends thousands for one meal.

At last, we're still having a meal to avoid the hunger.

Poor babies, we are.

When I spend the money, I know I am enjoying.

But when I look at some poor kids through Youtube or passages forwarded to my email or spread through facebook, maybe I have a bit guilty but it doesn't help much.

What can I do is so little, I can't even afford for my outing sometimes, (Okay, please don't show your pity face ya, I have my financial planning, so close your mouth and swollen all the words you want to say to me if you have.) I try to find everything which is lower cost, or maybe I had paid for it, so I just use it till the max.

By the way, even I am facing financial crisis, I do live well.

Thanks to... I can't even think of thanks to who. Okay, maybe my parents, yes, this is definitely I need to thank them.

You know what?

I hate that people always saying they are poor to me.

They seriously don't know what is its meaning.

They still afford to buy shirts, watch a movie, having a meal that costs RM10 and above.

Ow, you might think: OMG~ Those are just small money!

Ha.. Accumulated all your expense, I can buy a ticket and go for a trip, NO LIES ON YOU.

Opps, it's too much for tonight!

I think I'm only able to sleep for 5 hours and wake up for the class.

Goodnight!

PS: No arguing with me because this is my own thought and seriously no offense. I would like to apologize if there is anyone who feels unwell with this post. =)

100803: BoA(보아) - HURRICANE VENUS

It's BoA!! Finally she is back.

Actually, I have watched this teaser for 10 times and above, I guess.

Haha.. it is just too nice!

I listened to the audio too.. She made me had a high expectation on her comeback, and yes, all of us do.

5 years, it is not a short period but she proved herself in everywhere: Japan, Korea and even US!!

She is born to be singer, no doubt on it!

Just check this teaser out! =)

100802

It's really suck when you gonna face all those about PRIDE.

I really feel like wanna scold F*** to myself.

There's nothing big deal~

It's just feel suck when you see your friends step one step or even more than you at the same time.

People around you are talking some units that you supposed to get this semester.

And where are you?

2 steps behind.

And you can't do anythings.

Because you are not smart enough and rich enough!

F*** my life, seriously, I might think like that sometimes.

But, I have to feel thankful that at least I'm given a chance to study.

Although I'm not smart enough but I am studying.

My study failure isn't equal to fail my life, but we know that study is a part of our lives.

It's really not a big deal compare to some can't even study at all and went to work in a young age.

I should really feel thankful.

Okay! And now, goodnight!

I'm gonna fight for tomorrow!

A new day has come; a new semester has began; a new war is waiting for me.

Keep your smiling on your face, and you will able to win till the end. =)

100725

寫些什麽啊~

想寫啊~可是不知從何寫起。

今天終于去正視課程表這東西。

不是我不要正視，實在有原因讓我不要去想它。

現在的情況，其實已經是我該覺得萬幸了。

不至於連書都讀不了，延遲畢業已經在預料之中。

說不埋怨是假的，可是自己也沒那麽聰明，能掌握好全部課業。

很多人都說我聰明，結果我考個屁出來。

很多人說我懶惰，結果我是發奮了，還是屁一個。

我說，我有自知之明。

不要讓我的自卑感越來越強。

然後我又得顧自己面子，結果自尊心越來越強。

到最後，自己也了解，這些都是屁！

爲了抗拒這些想法，我還得找理由來説服自己不要有那些負面的想法。

儘管朋友都說延遲畢業不是什麽大問題，可是不是你，你不會知道那些讓你感到洩氣的想法。

同期的同學，與你的步伐不能同步。

他們越走越遠，而我只能縮短我的腳步，配合自己的能力，慢慢地往上爬。

是好事。

至少自己沒那麽吃力。

家裏也沒那麽吃力。

難受的只是自己的那顆心。

罷了。

也不是什麽大問題。

就只是想要發洩一下。

100721

Kinda long time didn't update my blog.

Honestly, I always have some words in my mind and I wanna share it out.

But.. Ha.. it always pops out before I fall asleep.

I know I have a bad habit which is always think too much before I fall asleep.

And always, I forgot what did I think. LOL?

I'm tired now actually, and sleepy.

But I just feel like wanna update one post.

Mind blank, sadly.

Ar~ I dreamed a dream on last 2 nights.

The content was so blur for me right now.

But I do remember of some important scenes.

I was at airport, Penang.

Will be going to somewhere else..

2 of my friends came to send me off.

We were chatting there.

One of them walked away, I thought she was going to answer or have a phone call and I just not bother about it.

The other friend walk nearer to me and said: She is angry on you.

I was like :Huh?! What's wrong?

She told me that I made a joke yesterday and the joke made her angry.

OMG~ I run to her and stop her from walking away. She starred at me.

I asked: Are you angry on me?

She said: No.

I said: Tell me. Are you angry on me?

She kept her mouth shut.

I just said sorry to her and she ignored me.

Oh gosh, what can I do was just keep on saying sorry and promise not to say such joke again and I think I did something stupid to make her happy again.

Finally, she smiled again and saw me step into the airplane.

Okay, story ended.

This is not the first time I dreamed of my friends but seriously this is the first time it so real. I just feel like it will happen in the future and I beg it not.

Of course, I hided somethings for this story, if I say it out all, I must be crazy.

I can't do it and I hope it won't be real.

Unless.. there is an unless.. but I don't look at this UNLESS, it is a future tense.

I have no ability to handle the present, what for I look at the future?

C'mon, I need to make myself strong enough to handle everything by myself.

And that time, I will have the UNLESS. LOL.

Goodnight!

100620

What's so special today?

Actually today is not a special day, but we created a lot of memories for today.

Why do we do so?? I have no idea too.

Maybe it's because almost end of the semester?

Maybe we are just too excited for our coming holidays?

Maybe we are just too random. XD

Whatever it is, it makes us happy and appreciate.

We didn't mention to Crystal that we were going to her church tonight.

Instead, we were still pretending to have our dinner at home and she keep on reminding me what to cook before she left home. I smiled and said yes to her.

The night before, I text my housemate who will be going to church too and I asked him whether we can follow his car or not and he said no problem. Good news for us as we have 5 people, his car surely can fit us. =)

Secretly doing all of these just wanna surprise Crystal and yes, we did.

She even sang the song wrongly when she saw us appeared in the church.

Who said that surprise can be only occurred during special occasion?

Nope, randomly make a surprise and you can feel that how lovely is your friends.

Before we left, I received a tagged video from Siew.

Surprisingly, she made a video for us.

The photos from the eldest to the youngest, featuring the song "Shining Friends".

Felt so touched and my tears almost dropped down.

I appreciated it so much although it might be a simple video for other else but I couldn't express my feeling through words.

They are one of the most precious things that God gives me in this world, I appreciated so much.

Once again, thank you very much for being my friends.

We have our late dinner at 9.15pm, I think.

Ordered 3 dishes: Sweet and Sour Pork Rice, Apple Fish Rice and Lamp Chop Rice. (Sorry if I said the name wrongly), with 4 cups of Ice Tea C and 2 cups of Hot Milk.

The dishes are more than enough for 6 of us. The dishes are just too large for girls.

Suggest if you are going to the place for dinner, please share with your friend, I'm pretty sure you can't finish it by yourself and that's why we order 3 dishes for 6 people. =)

Surprisingly, it costs us RM39.50 only. XD

(Place: Ah Tao)

We laughed a lot due to our foolishness and of course took a lot of photos.

I asked the others: Do we look weird because we took photo in a public dinner place?

They answered me: Who cares? They don't even know who are we.

I laughed and said: And we are driving a car with KK car plate.

After our dinner, we went home.

I'm too full and haven't take shower at this moment. (It's 12.28am now)

And now, I'm going to take my shower and take a rest.

PS 1: The memories created will always put in my heart. I will not forget the happiness that all of you brought to me and I always feel happy to be with you girls.

Even though I complaint sometimes but I'm just joking and I know all of you love me just like how I love you.

PS 2: A good friend is hard to be found in this world, not even the best friend.

How lucky am I to have all of you and act like my family in actual life.

You are always listening to me; fooling around with me; having fun with me, the everyone of you.

I'm putting all of you in the deepest place of my heart and I know you too.

Whenever we start to busy for our lives, wherever we at for our jobs, I hope there is a day when all of us meet again, we are still the same us.

PS 3: Thanks for every little things that you have done for me. Thanks for being with me. And lastly, thanks for being my friends.

Love,

NyetYee Lim

100616

Ha.. I'm currently doing not well, I think.

Why? Final exam is one of the reasons but yea.. I know it's hard but I will work hard on it.

Currently suffering from financial crisis.

HAHA.. but somehow I always see the advertisements of making money through faceboook?

Seriously, it attracted me but I didn't go and ask for information because I think it is too risky.

However, I found another online making money again.

But I just create for fun.. Cause I don't think it can make money although the website keep on saying there are how many millions been made through this online investment.

Okay. I'm stupid at that moment but I just wanna try since I do no gain any loss but only create a fake account. Not using my own personal phone number, email address and even name.

Okay fine. I used Jejune. Haha.. But it is just my nickname, isn't it?

Hahaha.. Just let have fun by making a stupid mistake??

http://www.vemmabuilder.com/27091458

Click this and register yourself but remember, do not upgrade yourself as a MEMBER because it needs you to pay for somethings. I think I will earn from this, maybe? XD

100602

若我在此時告訴你，我的心是如此的不安，告訴我你的想法。

受了一篇文章的影響，有種被拉囘現實的想法。

我活在現實，在網上尋找虛擬，偶爾地沉迷，卻讓我忘了原來這世界依舊現實。

儅你想著：啊！我願抛開所有，只爲了夢，無所謂是怎麽樣的夢。

現實卻告訴你：你拿什麽來圓夢？

儅你爲了夢，一次次的向現實低頭，那是否想過，你或許偏離你的夢越來越遠了？

有些夢，以爲是完美的。

儅時間慢慢流逝，你開始慢慢醒悟，夢，不過是自己編織得太過於童話。

儅童話不再照著你預想的，心開始怕了，慌了。

到最後，接受了。

唯一不同的是，你或許依舊念著那童話，卻也知道童話不再了。

那麽過往的美好也就成了回憶。

回憶，多漂亮的畫面；多傷人的紀念……

今夜，感傷了。

深夜，清醒了。

醒來，地球還是轉動，而我依舊繼續生活。

晚安。

100601

I was reading a passage, saying sending a friend at airport.

Hahaha.. Guess what did I recall?

Four of us woke up early in the morning, 6am!! OMG~!

I didn't even tell my mom that I will be going out because mom was asleep before I could tell her. HAHA..

It is a memory, nice memory.

Although we didn't really wanna make her cries, but at least we expect she shall cry!

HAHAHA.. At last, she didn't..

But I know she was very touch that time..

Such a crazy actions, went to her house which is located far from the city just to say Byebye.

Driving the car for one hour without knowing destination, keep on chit-chatting.

And finally, back to home and slept for 4 hours and then waited at the airport for almost 2 hours just to surprise her.

Miss ya always, you know who are you~ XD

100319

Finally there is a concert, of Super Junior.

I have no strong mind of going, but I know I wish to see them.

I miss them a lot as a singer, not gag men.

But I miss TVXQ more.

I saw a post saying that 4th album of Suju will be released in May.

I think of TVXQ, again.

I was thinking, if there is no law suit, this year might be their 6th album.

Sometimes, I blamed the law suit.

But I know it was actually a good decision.

This is why I always remind myself to support their decision and trust them without any doubt.

I'm tiring of doing homework everyday but I have no choice.

I'm gonna mastered all the units, or else I will regret, for sure.

I'm praying, praying to have a good study mode.

And I know I will. Thanks God!

I'm just too stressed sometimes.

Give me a break!

100317

It's been long time for me since January to blog.

I have a fun and enjoyable trip in Hong Kong with my FAMILY, a gang of friends from Tawau!!

I appreciated it very much as I don't know when will be the next trip with them..

The photos were uploaded in facebook..

It's crazy, man.. over 1000 photos..

I can't even pick some nice to upload..

Just pressed CTRL + A, dragged them all into an album.

I have a lot of fun during the pass holiday..

It doesn't boring at all.

Almost out for tea for everyday or night..

You can't imagine that even you only out for "yamcha", it costs you hundreds ringgit!! HAHAHA..

But yet, I gained a lot of happiness.

It is not countable by using money..

I reached Miri three weeks ago.

I moved to new house but I did not tell my dad and mom.

Why?

You'll know how much you need to explain to them once you do so.

This is why I didn't tell them.

My expenses increased but I gained more than before? Might be.

You know what??

My timetable is totally different with my friends at first.

I keep on changing till I still can maintain some of my units with 2c2 but no more with my housemate, Twins and Sibu girls.

I'm quite upset at first, frankly speaking (Haha, does this phrase sound familiar??).

Feel a bit lonely, and I don't know who to rely sometimes.

I know it's my own problem.

And I didn't let the problem becomes bigger and bigger as I know it's actually not a big deal.

As long as I'm still able to study and meet with them always, it's still so good, right?

Seriously, I feel so good right now.

I know more people in my class, maybe have to thanks to Ms. Sia(Finance 215)?

Haha, no wonder she will says Lover Her or Hate Her. Hahaha..

I have a lot of weekly assignments that I always couldn't finish on time.

Frankly speaking, I am much more hardworking than previous semesters..

Even my friends shocked when they see me doing the works.. haha..

I know that I was too lazy before..

Thanks God?

Thanks God. =)

100131

It's the last day of January.
How do you feel?
I am wondering how could the time flies without noticing me.
Maybe I should say that I didn't appreciate time.

I feel so pressure, honestly.
There is a trip waiting for me but I didn't finish my study.
How could you study with an exciting mood?
While exciting, you have the tension with you..
I feel so hard...

I'm not in a good mood, obviously.
Maybe it's because I still have to study before trip?

I didn't complain much about it because it's my fault.
Jason keep on concerning about my study.
He scare that I have no enough time to study.
Haha.. I remember Yuhmiin said that we are the same type of human which is last minute person.
But, obviously she forgets that I'm not as smart as her.

Maybe I was smart before.
But I know that I'm not as smart as the old time.
My brain is losing its function..

I'm afraid of somethings.
But since haven't been checked, I have no idea about it. lolx..
Don't worry, I'm strong enough to face anything, I think. XD

100129

How would you describe me?
Haha.. I created a secret group for my Tawau friends..
You know, we are just too friend to be like a family..
The description about me make me laugh, it's just so true..
But, how would others think of me?

Here is the description from my Tawau's gang:
Rebellious figure that always believes in her state of mind.
Cold, evil-eyed, Hilarious at times, Gets the point.
Someone who is actually aware during various situations.
Facebook Freak / Stalker.
Tries to make her statements Points.

==============================

You know what?
I always heard that I am a good listener or good adviser or good observer.
But this is the first time(?) I heard this kind of description..
Haha.. So, how's about yours to me?

100116

淩晨兩點鈡不睡覺，幹嗎去了？
呵~就是在電腦面前，看看video，打打字~

我現在人在西馬。
天亮做的事不再是睡覺或是玩電腦。
猜也猜得到是逛街啦~~哈哈哈……

滿期待明天的。
黃穎敏特地過來找我，陪我。
還蠻感動得啦~
她確實可以不必這麽麻煩坐那麽久的車，然後就爲了和我見上一面，然後第二天就回去。
這樣的朋友，哪裏找？？

我記得Aubery說過我很保護朋友。
事實上，我知道我是，只是從朋友聽見，還蠻奇怪的。
哈哈哈……沒什麽意思，只是不習慣吧！

你說，如果我沒了朋友會怎樣？
我無法想象，也不想想像。

我喜歡現在，知道嗎？
你看我在美裏的朋友多麽愛我（哈哈哈……承認吧！），當然我也愛她們啦！
沒有她們，我實在不懂美裏的生活該怎麽過。

你看在斗湖。
我過得多麽逍遙快活。
時不時喝個茶，看場電影或者兜個風……爽啊！
所以，你們都要乖乖呆在我身邊哦！
不然，我會傷心死的！=)

100107

I am missing someone a lot, can you guess who is it? XD
The whole day, I couldn't stop thinking of her and I know why.
I dreamed her in my dream actually and this caused my missing to her. =p

Didn't meet with her for one year.
I'm not sure of how is her appearance changing to, but I know she is still the one I know.
Thanks to the one who created phone so that we can contact with each other. =)

I received a call from her just now.
She told me that she isn't in a good mood.
I couldn't help much after I heard the reason.
What I can do is just pray and care for her.

Is she crying on the other side?
I couldn't get know.
I just feel like she was about to cry?
Hope that I guess wrong.
However, she has the reason to cry but I know she wouldn't cry in front of me, seldom.

Girl,
I miss you much.
Take care of yourself always, kay?
Everything will be alright soon. =)

100101：Two Thousands Ten!!

It's brand new year!!!
See my date there: 100101..
Hahaha.. how nice is this number, maybe we should go and buy 6d? lolx..

It wasn't as fun as what I thought in passing my last day of 2009.
Anyways, I was still with my friends although just few of them.

I was happy that I received quite numbers of greeting messages.
Especially from my best friends.. haha..
And when I received the message from YingMin and Roland, I shown to Eva.. I said: See, I got their messages~ hahaha..
I know it is childish, but I'm happy in playing it cause the reaction of Eva was so funny..
She even wanted to send message to them and ask them to greet her! lolx..

Hey, it's no more two double O nine..
Here comes two thousands ten!!
Looking forward on the brand new year..
What's the difference? Yea~ we are getting older.. hahahaha

Anyways,
I miss you, to the one who missed me.
Happy New Year, guys and girls!! XD