091231

I have to say goodbye to 2009, finally..?

I was listening to 2ne1's "I don't care".
A question comes into my mind again: Can I really don't care?
Lolx... What should I care, what shouldn't I care?
Can anybody hints me? =)

Fine.
I couldn't get the answer now.
I wish I don't have to think more and enjoy my life without these nonsense.
Get off from my life, I wish but I know it wouldn't.

*Smile
Hey~ cheer up.
It is not a big deal if it didn't meet your expectation.
It's really fine for me, anything.
Whatever~ I can only know what's going on in the future~~

Wooo...
I should think for my trip!
KahYee is joining us to Hong Kong!!
It's really make me feel so good!
I wish to always be with her when she needs a friend.
And this is one of the reason that I invite her to come with us..
I am really looking forward on our trip now!!
Wow~~~
All of my best friends are with me next year, the HK trip, the KK trip and maybe my birthday? =)

You don't know how I wish all of my best friends would celebrate my birthday with me but not early celebration or just a birthday song and message.
I remembered I said to Grace that I wouldn't cry during my birthday but in fact, if really all of you are celebrating with me, I couldn't make my promise of not dropping tears.. XD

I miss you guys, really!
Grace, I miss the time I quarrel with you. XD
Mich, I miss the time I bully you. XD
Nyiam, I miss the time you laugh with us. XD
Siew, I miss the time you always "hehe" there.. XD
Jac, I miss the time you always come to Senadin and accompany me. =)
Crys, I miss the time talk with you until we fall asleep at midnight. =)
Kee, I miss the time we always go out with Hsia. =)
Hsia, I miss the time we chat a lot and sharing many things with each other. =)

====================================

Goodnight all...
I am waiting for a reply that wouldn't get.
Hehe.. anyways, sweet dream~

And, BYE YA 2009!!

091210

我在想一件事：什麽時候我才能真正呼吸自由的空氣？
太多的束縛，我沒有辦法活出自我。

我想要拿著照相機，看到什麽拍什麽。
我很想駕著車，在路上不顧自身的危險奔馳。
我很想做一樣事是沒有後顧之憂。

只可惜，這是不太可能的吧？

今天和媽媽說了一句：這樣的旅行，可能就此一次吧。
媽媽沒聼懂，反問我爲什麽。
我沒有回答。
怎麽回答？

每個朋友都知道我是個極愛自由之人。
可偏偏，該和我最親的人，卻不懂真正的我。
他們只需要我做他們理想中的孩子，順著他們的意思，好讓他們少煩點。

我順了，心會痛。
不順了，心會有愧疚。

真害怕，以後我有能力自己生活的時候，我會把什麽忽略了。

091209

今天成績出了，沒什麽意外。
從考場出來，就大概知道了自己的成績。
感謝上帝，沒有讓我失望。

有時候真痛恨自己的直覺。
直覺中，會有一科需要重考。
直覺中，把重考的時間表都抄好了。
直覺中，把機票來回都想好了。

只是能不能幸運到改機票是免費的？
真希望能夠如此，這樣就省下了少少。=)

心裏其實沒有多大的起伏，我是說真的。
只是希望有人和我分享這一刻的心情吧~
無奈的心情……

啊~有誰願意把課本寄過來斗湖嗎？
縂不能只是讀Lecture Notes就想過關吧？
另外三科讓我這樣矇過關了，可這一次不可能吧？

哦！那麽回去的那兩天一夜，要住哪裏？
失策……失策……慢慢想吧！
我累了，晚安。

091207

最近新出的電影都是大製作，很吸引別人去看的。
2012、Ninja Assassin、Twilight，哈~我全部都還沒看。
爲什麽？沒人約我去看咯！
三部裏有兩部是看不成的，唉~真衰！

因爲在家裏悶，Streamyx又從來不眷顧我們斗湖消費者，開個網頁要幾分鈡，受得了嗎？
結果，跑去看我之前download的電影。

看了The Curious Case of Benjamin Button。
如果這事情發生在我身上，我還真不知道會是怎樣的一個人生。

赤壁下。
這永遠是最讓我佩服的電影之一。
之前看赤壁上的時候，那種澎湃的心情，真的有讓我覺得活在亂世也不錯，至少那滿腔熱血不會無用武之地。
到底是電影音效做得太好，還是電影院的音響太好導致我有這種想法？
但，沒有了歷史，這些都不會呈現出來。

看著下集，很多想法纏繞在心頭。
仗一打，犧牲的都是人命，看得心很酸。
話説得再衛冕堂皇，看在我眼裏，不過是草菅人命，踏著別人的生命來享受自己的欲念。

十萬大軍，全軍覆沒，你能想象嗎？
畫面是很壯觀，只可惜三國的亂仗，最後誰也沒得益。

一直以來都在想像火燒連環船。
看三國的時候想一次，覺得這計謀太絕了。
看鳳于的時候想一次，覺得鳳鳴對容恬的絕對信任，而向若言獻此策，那阿曼江整片的火海，讓人心生佩服，佩服鳳鳴的睿智，有空真該重讀一次。
終于，看赤壁的時候，不用想了，它就這麽呈現給我。
唯一想到的詞只有：人命。

(噢~我想會有很多人讀不懂鳳于那一部份，其實我是寫給特定的人看的，看不懂就Skip吧！)

===========================

人活在世上，爲什麽會有二心？
我不能保證自己對任何的人、事、物都會是一心一意。
可是我盡量讓自己忠誠于某些。
人啊~是世界上最聰明的生物，卻也是最笨的生物。

091204

十二月了，時間過得很快。
快得讓我發現原來我身邊的朋友，原來都已經認識了好幾年。
記得有一兩次和秀她們聊天，天啊！我們認識了兩年。

這兩年，說真的，還蠻感謝遇上的朋友是她們。
真心相待，無話不談。
在她們面前，我是最放鬆的。
我知道她們知道那是我。

我的改變是好的吧？
至少我覺得自己給人的第一印象不是冷冷的，還算不錯吧？呵呵呵……

有時候很想念她們啊！
不用多說就知道我想做什麽……
隨便一個笑，都知道我想說什麽。
雖然偶爾的揶揄，可是還是那樣開心。
哈哈……我們自有我們的一套溝通方法。
真不曉得如果我們真住在一起，會是怎樣……
我想，會是吵死人吧？哈哈哈……

其實此刻的我，不是在想她們啦~
只是不知道爲什麽手不由自主地就把這些打出來了。
也好，不需要把不應該說的說出來。
只會為自己增加無謂的煩惱~ =)

091127

很常，心裏總是希望家是溫暖的。
不是我的家不溫暖，只是常常爲了這溫暖，我特意忽略那些背裏諷刺。
我相信這是我的家，我看到溫暖，卻每每有人無意地提醒其他人背地裏的嘲諷。

我不作聲，只是希望早日自己有能力不靠這個家。
別人要怎麽說，不是我能控制的範圍，我只是盡我該盡的孝道。

一直以來我都知道，我喜歡待在美裏，並不是因爲美裏好，只是因爲這裡讓我遠離了些是非。
一些我不能不聼，卻狠狠的讓我失望的是非。

我承諾于自己：他日，我會還恩，卻不會多做。
我不會撕破臉，依舊笑臉迎人，不是我不生氣，只是那對我沒好處。

我能想象，未來的日子，我們一家四口會在遠離這而暢懷大笑。

091118

現在還真的是淩晨三點鐘了~
不是特意不睡覺，只是我在陪我的housemate讀書。
正確來説，我人在這裡玩電腦，她在讀書。

終于考完試了！
謝天謝地~
可是，心裏還是憂慮的。
畢竟這次不懂能不能過關，會不會被當掉。
死了咯~ 唉！！
能做的，只有祈禱，也只能祈禱。

===============================

人心難測。
你不懂這一刻在你身邊的人是不是真心對你，然後在下一刻會對你做出什麽傷害。
我並不想傷害任何人，可是有時候傷害會在無形中造成。

可是，有些人則是故意傷害其他人。
我想不通爲什麽，也不想去想。
反正這世界，就是有這樣的人。

我不能去改變人。
但我可以決定我對這些人的看法和做法。
疏遠，是我最喜歡的決定。

當一個人是陌生人的時候，他對你做的，應該不會傷害到你。
時間，會讓兩個熟悉的人變成陌生人。

091115

我把我的情緒化爲文字，為的就是不讓自己情緒失控；為的也只是有一處發洩地。

很常在苦惱著，什麽樣的生活最適合我？
真要我說出來，我還怕被人罵沒良心~

如果真的可以，我不要一切束縛（這是不可能的）。
然後，在秋天裏漫無目的的在街上走走，看看人群，看看風景。
之後，把一切記錄起來。

只是，還是有讓我牽絆的人，事和物。
一個人，再怎麽自由，都會被自己在意的是牽絆著。
我不是冷血的人，所以我不可能放下一切。

有時候，我很喜歡待在美裏。
説不上來整體的感覺，只是少了一些壓力。

我厭惡世俗的壓力，厭惡金錢的壓力，更厭惡自己的無能爲力。
我很想活在自己的世界裏，可是縂有原因讓我不能這樣做。
一是個性，二是不想拒人於千里之外。
儘管自己厭惡別人打擾我的世界，可是我還是寧願放下自己的事。
有時候的結果，自己滿意。
不滿意的時候，皺一皺眉就讓它過去了吧！

別人的事，我不會多問。
可是，如果他願意說，我願意聼。
至於意見，我還是會給，受不受用，又是另一回事了。

（怎麽感覺這篇有點像在抱怨？）=)

091111

這幾天下來，心裏多多少少都有些壓抑。
當然，還是因爲考試。

Study Week的時候，自己不太能專心讀書。
原因？自己懂就好了。=)

可是，看了自己的Internal marks，還是不免失落了一下。
從來都知道自己不強，卻沒有想過改變，加強自己。
應該說，每次我都有心無力吧~
我沒有動力讓我把自己訓練的更好。
腦裏有很多計劃，可是真正付諸行動的，又有幾個？

每晚的祈禱，希望能減低我的心理負擔。
讓我好好的入眠，是這幾天祈禱時都會提到的。
可是，淺眠的我，加上在這緊張的時刻，實在沒有辦法好好入眠。
甚至做噩夢，把自己嚇得一身冷汗。

有時候，希望時間快一點，這樣我的假期也隨之而來了。
可是，另一方面，我不夠時間讀書啊！
每一次都是臨時抱佛腳，何時才改得了？

給自己一個希望吧！
不許對未來失望！

越來越期待我的假期了。
既可以旅行，也可以去看看很久不見的人。
想念吧？這不是廢話嗎？哈哈哈……

091103

“天地創造了時間，時間製造了歷史，歷史遺留下回憶，回憶又被時間沖淡。”
“你愛一個人的時候縂覺得他是不夠愛你的，所以愛與被愛皆不公平，世間最公平的關係叫做，陌生。”

是否覺得這兩句寫得很好？
呵呵……不要去找出至於誰的手筆，除非你真的很好奇。
既然你好奇了，請你接受這人。

不管他是誰，我認同他說的話。
不便發表自身的意見，但願有人能夠了解我的心情。

091102

十一月來了。
代表著我的考試要來了。
更重要的是：我的假期也要來了！
興奮啊！

我腦裏突然“硼”出一個問題：人爲什麽要有朋友？
人一定要有朋友才能生存嗎？

有點驚訝這些問題出自于自己的腦。
畢竟自己是多麽清楚“朋友”對我來説是多麽的重要。d(^_^)b

可是，這幾天的事讓我不得不重新看待人的朋友的定義。
可能很多人不知道，其實我很喜歡待在美裏呢！
你問我爲什麽？

我大概只能回答：這裡的人、事、物都讓我很舒心。
當然，偶爾還是會有困擾。
可是，我知道在這裡我遠離的是什麽。

回到斗湖，見的一些人都不知道能不能稱之爲朋友。
至少在這裡，我知道這一班人，不管我什麽時候無聊，都能去找（除了半夜哦~）。
有時候，我們真像一家人，不是嗎？
打打鬧鬧的，互相假假的挑撥離間，只是大家都懂彼此的個性。
可以說生活了快兩年了，還能不懂嗎？=)

可是，回到去，我有時候真的不知道要找誰。
可是，最後還是得回的，不是嗎？

西馬的？
或許會找吧？
自己去的時間也不長，大家也不常聯絡，要他們特地抽時間來找我，好像很唐突。
不知道自己爲什麽會有這樣的想法，可能我不習慣帶麻煩給人家。
所以呢？
還是和姐姐逛逛就好了吧？哈哈……

可能是現在的心情沒怎麽好吧。
所以想法都開始有點不好。

等自己舒心點，或許就會像自己多一點了。

091028

今天浪費了一整天。
我應該要讀書的，可是卻做了無謂的事。
雖無謂，可是卻讓我發現一些事，還不錯。

吃完了晚飯，我坐在電腦面前。
謝謝瑩說她看了他的status兩次才看明白。
然後我跑去看，哈哈……原來是這回事啊~
過後又是說我們都是適合寫華語。

是嗎？
我一直是認爲因爲我的英文不好，所以表達能力也不好。
至於華語，我也只是跟著心裏面想說的話而寫，沒什麽刻意。
然後，看了那status，我也有感而發。

“有時候，能選擇是一種幸運；能擁有是幸福；會失去，或許是解脫。”
這世上，只有“生老病死”是不能選擇的，對吧？
所以，能選擇，是上天賜的，而我們是幸運的。

能擁有，固然是幸福的。
只是，幸福能維持多久？
我不知道。
或者說，你能擁有多久，就幸福多久？
可是，這真的是你能所擁有的嗎？
真的是屬於你的嗎？
我在想：什麽是屬於我的？
我擁有什麽？哪天我不再擁有了呢？

那天我不再擁有了，那就是失去了。
失去了的，還是我的幸福嗎？
不是，既然會失去的，那必定不是我的幸福。
既然不是我的幸福，那我就是從中解脫了。

可能我曾經幸福。
只是那是短暫性的，那我何必佔著它呢？

我相信，是我的就是我的，不是我的，何必強求？
既來之，則安之，不是嗎？

091028

時間一天一天地過，我卻什麽都還沒做。
自己果然還是那種“不見棺材不流淚”，不到最後一分鐘都不要努力的人。

唉~夜已深……
我的雙眼早就已經開不到了，可是就是不甘願去睡。
不想去想爲什麽不睡。
其實不用想也知道的……
只是想要否認而已~

有一件事是想和你們分享的。
可是，想了一想，還是不要在大庭廣衆之下說出來。
一來省了誤會，二來省了謠言。

===============================

人與人之間，到底該怎麽相處才能達到平衡？
遷就？如果只是單一的遷就，縂有一天還是會出問題的。
可不是嗎？
你看，我身邊的麻煩可讓我們都頭痛了。
誰理她啊！看著都煩~
真想罵她粗口，算了，保持形象。（雖然早就沒有什麽形象的了~哈哈哈）

算了，晚安。

091026：放縱

何謂放縱？爲何放縱？
情感放縱？放縱情感？

我討厭放縱自己的人。
這是我的實話。

我想不透，是爲了什麽而放縱？
愁？愁什麽？

不想去了解。
不想去勸解。
不想去化解。

總歸一句：這不是我能理的事，儘管我不喜歡，真的很不喜歡。

===============================

或許該說，我不想讓人覺得我太多管閒事了。
所以，我才不去理吧~
所以，我才會常說：那是你的選擇。

不想，真的不想。
不想到最後有一種“好心做壞事”的想法纏繞在心。

儘管我學會了樂觀，可是骨子裏還是我。
我還是那個多慮的人……

我的最終想法不過是想努力經營好每一段友情。
儘管曾經破裂，或已經破裂，我只要看到你們好就好。
我不該干涉，也干涉不了別人的生活。
我還是過好自己的吧！

091025：許願

倘若有一天，我向佛祖許願，能實現嗎？
倘若有一天，我向耶穌許願，會實現嗎？

兩者都是世上的神，而我只是個凡人。
世上活著許許多多比我還需要祂們，可是我還是忍不住想向祂門許個小小願望。
什麽願望？

很簡單，就許我一個未來。
一個我心裏的未來。
看似簡單，實際上我是貪心的，對吧？
如果我說我要我的未來有身份，有地位，有財富，有情，那這個真不是一個小的願望。

四者選一？
呵呵~ 那我該選擇哪一個？

或許是由情況替我選擇吧~
那麽就是順其自然了。

可是，有誰會這麽甘心，任由命運帶著你？
我可能就不是其中一員了。
我心裏有個夢，一個不太可能會實現，卻每每讓自己留著一絲希望的夢。
這真的是很私人的秘密了，不能說。XD

我的神，我的主，
請許我一個未來吧~

091019：始終只有黑夜

我躲在黑夜裏，等待著黑暗給我一些動力。
呵呵~不就是做功課嗎？ （倒地了吧？）

陷入迷茫，似乎是最近常發生的事。
爲了什麽？
前途？金錢？還是……
沒有多餘的心思去想未來，因爲我連現在都顧不好。

我果然還是喜歡黑暗的。
雖然我不認爲自己很黑暗。
可是，我常把一句話挂在嘴上：我沒說我是好人。

喜歡一個人在晚上走回家。
望著時好時坏的路燈，我笑。
因爲它就好像知道我的心情一樣，時好時坏。
慢慢的步行回家，我很享受，儘管朋友會認爲很危險。
我思考的終點是我家，收拾心情，不讓坏情緒影響我的生活。

有人害怕黑暗。
我不是不怕，或許只有心虛的時候吧~
很多時候，我都是把黑夜當成朋友。
因爲唯有夜幕降臨，我的思考才有點方向，卻又帶點失望。
還不至於絕望，我說過，我已學會了樂觀。

什麽是絕望？
我沒經歷過，也不想，會是撕心裂肺的吧？
我才不要~！^^

扯遠了~
又是一個功課夜~

陪伴著我的，依舊只是黑夜。
哦~還有我的電腦~

加油~我的朋友們！

XOXO,

090919

Something happened.
I really don't wanna say more about it.
What I can say now is just we shouldn't expect on the hopeless people.

I believe there is a return on you.
If you are still trying to do the same things again, I swear that I will send you to the jail even though I need to pay out something!

===================================

It's another tuition free week again.
I wonder what should I do now..
I have debate, accounting and C.I.B presentation in the next 2 weeks.
Be prepared in 2 weeks time, I know I could.
But I'm just so lazy now.

I have been busy for 3 weeks, I think.
Non-stop busy time for us, luckily it's over now.
Now it's a little break time.
Enjoy? Not.

I received my result of Accounting Managerial 101.
Although it was just a mid-term, but it costs me 35%.
And now, I get a bad result although it is in my expectation.
What else can I say?
Thanks God.

Everyone is leaving for their holiday.
I'm still staying in Miri for my holiday.
Haha.. I feel good in Miri as I don't have to worry so much about others.
I hope to see my dad and mom here without worry so much at hometown.
When can we free from troubles?? I have no idea.
Let's God leads us to the peace.

Maybe we will move again next semester.
Why? We couldn't stand for one of my housemates.
Because of her, all of us are moving out.
Haha.. maybe you will ask why isn't she moves?
But we all know that is impossible.
It's fine for me as long as I have place to live.

Take care ya, my friends.
I would like to stay peace in Miri, hope so.
Should know that troubles come to find you but not you find the trouble. =)

XOXO,

090909

I was supposed to do my Accounting revision now.
But I have no motivation at all..

I have been very busy for past 2 weeks, and still going to be busy in the following weeks.
What a tough degree life~

I am running out of time and yet I'm still wasting my time~
What the heck!
I just feel so guilty but I can't control myself.

Today, I just know how important is water.
The first time, I face water supply problem in Miri.
My mom called me when she saw my status in Facebook.. lolx. my mom was just so funny..

I couldn't concentrate on doing tutorial works as I haven't bath that time.
But I still have no motivation to start it.. *sigh

There are some words I would like to say to my friends:
(Just identify yourself)

Today, I received a call from you.
I'm glad to hear you will be having a tough but good life in that university although I know not much about it.
Study hard, I know you can!
Sorry that couldn't talk much to you today as the time not allow me to talk more.

And you?
At first, saying that will study Law.
After that, prefer accounting.
Again, chose HELP university but then still feel like not interested in Law.
I thought you will call me last Saturday?
Aiks.. no matter what is your decision, I will always support you as long as that is your decision.

Hey..
We have quite a long time didn't skype, right?
Kinda miss you laugh~ XD
And I promised will call you after my busy time..
But I'm still in a busy mode..
Feel like wanna damn the assignments and assessments!!

This people, never contact me if I don't find her!
Aiks.. how are you?????!!!!
Seems like never chat and talk after the last call from SKYPE huh??
Aiks... let's talk again when all of us are free~

When did I talk to you the last time?
Lolx.. the accidentally call.
I was busy on submitting my marketing assignment that time.
Aiks.. Although not really like your life now, but hopefully that you can handle your study..

==============================

The first tuition free week has passed.
The first day of my tuition free week was I took my shower early in the morning at 6am~ XD
Hahaha.. Every friend was shocked about that.
And I slept at 7am.. good experience huh?
Hehehe.. might wondering why am I taking shower at that late(or early)?
I talk with my friend from 11.30pm on skype..
Shhhh.. I don't think she knows that I haven't take shower that time.. hehehe..

And then rush for assignments..
Sleep at 3 or 4 or 5am everyday~
Kinda tired but shuang~~ lolx...

And now, my second tuition free week is coming~
Hope that I can back to normal life. *wink*

Goodnightz!

XOXO,

090811

It's 1am now.
I should be lying on my bed and start to sleep.
But initially, I have something to take care of.
In fact, it doesn't matter with me.
I'm just kepo.. lolx..
But since it is my friend's matter, then I will concern about her.

Honestly, I'm not from a rich and even can say poor for recent situation.
What I can say to my parents is: Thank You.
No matter how hard is the situation we face, both of them are still supporting my sister and me to study in a better environment and university.
I know they are right and still keep their promise till now.

My sister is studying in Bachelor of Law in Bond University.
An university that is high course fees and high living expenses which are scaring everyone of going for it.
$3300 for one unit + Living expenses = $$$$
I bet everyone will not think of it after seeing the amount of needed to study there.
But, thanks God that my parents did not think for the same way too.

I rather we are suffering for now than we graduated from a not really good Uni and low-knowledge of our major and then earn RMX00.00 per month.
Who can tell me that when can I earn back my fees and money? lolx..
Hmm... Have no idea what am I talking about here.

Goodnight~!

XOXO,

090806

It's August now.
How am I? Good? So so? Bad?

Hmm...
The studies are going well, so far.
Miri life is just so so.. as we have nothing much to enjoy.
The weather is very hot now.. and full of haze everywhere.

We went to have Sushi King as our dinner due to it's new in Miri.
But really disappointed on the services and food as well.
I can accept the food is not nice but I couldn't accept the attitude of the waiters and waitresses there~ OMG<< My comment!

Everyone is ill now.
Do you know what is the different between ill and sick?
Lolx.. I bet you all will say ILL is more serious than SICK, right?
From what I understand from my CIB lecturer, SICK is near dead while ill is just ill.. hahaha..
So, when you said you are sick, mean that you are nearly dead, so don't make mistake anymore~ ^^

I think I have fully recovered from fever/coughing/soar throat~!
Yaahoooo!!!! That's great.
But the bad weather not allow me to eat fried foods..
I'm afraid that soar throat will come and find me again...

Since there is first dead case caused of H1N1 in Miri, Curtin is offering free mask at campus.
But I failed to get it because there is out of stock.. lolx..
It's cool to see all wearing mask in the campus.. hahahaha..
Looks fun but take this case seriously..
It's our lives..

Drink more water and take care ya, everyone!

XOXO,

090731

First week of my semester 2 ended, finally.
I wanna rest, not badly.. just need some rest.

Guess that I should post a lot today?
Nope.. I think I just summarize some of my life here.. XD

In the end, I still back to Miri in order to continue my study.. =.=
I attended tutorials on time and start to feel that have to work hard on this semester.
Do not let my laziness lead me to a dead road.. hahaha..

Sell books buy books.
The first things what we always do on the new semester starts.
I sold some books for my friends~
Argh.. I think I should earn some commission.. hahahaha
Quite tired and the money is not mine even.. lolx..
It's okay if I could help my friend to sell off their books..

I have a long walk just now..
From my house to a friend of Aubery, then went to Ivy's house and then to Sandy's place.
Back to my house again, then to Aubery's friend, Ivy and then send Grace back to her house which placed nearby Village and then walk back again.. Wow!!
Seriously, I'm super duper tired.

Sitting in front of my laptop now, with an empty feeling.
Our house is so silent and empty today.
Just feel empty.
Hsia went back to her aunt's place for few days, every week I think.
Kee and Maro are not at home.
Luckily Kee just back...
Not so empty but still..

Just feel so empty after back to Miri.
I could not find a way..
Someone tell me please? Lolx..

Goodnight all.
Bye Bye, July. =)

XOXO,

090716

I have passed a tiring day.
But I feel good~ wakakaka..
I went to have a breakfast with my grandma and my aunts.

After that, I went to my aunt's shop which is selling spectacles.
Lolx.. my aunt asked me to choose which I like.. kekeke..
I rejected for twice but then she still ask me to choose.
I just choose one I like without seeing the price.. oh no!
So, I got a free spectacles from my aunt, thanks!
Hahahahaha.. help her to promote now~~

Reach home a while then out to fetch my mom.
Tired!!!!
After that fetch my another aunt and cousin, reach home at 5pm.

After take my dinner and send my cousin to tuition, I couldn't stop myself from falling asleep.
I was too tired.
I slept at 8pm.. Wow!!

Although woke up around 11pm, but I still feel tired..
Gonna sleep earlier today!

Oh~!
Hsia gonna take her supplementary test later morning~
Hsia, fighting!
Good luck to you ya~

XOXO,

090715

I'm not in a good mood these days, I admitted.
But I found my way to not always in a bad mood.
I don't want to angry because I know that is tired for me.
I just ignored, everything!

For the past two weeks, nothing special happened on me.
I went to the school anniversary.
I saw my teachers and talked with them.
Teacher Seah asked me why am I become slimmer =.=
I think teacher say so to me every time I back to meet with her.. hahahaha...

Friends that in hospital back to their own houses long time ago~ hahaha..
Good~ Take care!

Result released!
Quite shocked when I saw the result was just passed!
Wow! Luckily I passed all the units.

Timetable released!
I used two or three days to make it till I gonna be crazy.
Why?
Because the timetable is keep on changing!
What the F***!!!
At last, Irene done the timetable.. lolx..

But because of the late payment, I gonna register on next Monday.
Lolx????
Work so hard on the timetable but could not register at the first second!
What the F***!
I can't even know whether next week if there is any available seat for me.

I don't have the feeling to go out.
I'm still feel so down if I didn't watch the Family Outing!
That's really a good show that makes me laugh always, even the late night.

It's 2am now.
I have to wake up at 7am later to have a breakfast with my grandma.
It's the first time after I back from Miri.
Lolx.. Although it's a bit late but I'm still a good girl ^^

2 weeks later I will be at Miri again.
I feel a lot of pressure suddenly.

But I prefer stay at Miri now!
I feel like more pressure on me when I'm at Tawau.
Lolx.. Fighting!!

Goodnight.

XOXO,

090703：生日快樂

今天我生日，十九嵗。
收到很多人的祝福，很多是：Enjoy your day。
怎樣才算是Enjoy？

哈哈哈……還蠻開心的啦~
至少不是自己一個人過。
至少還有生日歌聼。
至少還是有些人會記得我的生日。

生日的第一餐，淩晨一點去吃KFC。
差點沒把我撐太飽，結果回到傢睡不着。

我想今年我的生日是最刺激的吧~
猜我跑去做什麽了？
斗湖證實有H1N1之後，還要確定其中兩個是我們的朋友，Jason盡朋友的義務送食物還有一些必需品給他們。
我也是有去！
刺激吧？？
H1N1哦~~雖然不是很嚴重的病，但是感染上了，也是不好過的。
在醫院的時候，你真的有一種抗拒踫到任何東西的心理狀態！
那一刻，我真的覺得我們很勇~ 哈哈哈哈……

日子開始有點難過了。
人都好像人間蒸發了~

==========================

今年，有人忘了我的生日。
失望？=)


祝我生日快樂，晚安！

XOXO,

090701

I stayed at home whole day time.
Hehehehe.. Yea.. Better stay at home now~
Why? Because Tawau has a case of H1N1 already.

Unfortunately, the guy is a friend of my friend.
Luckily, I'm not really close with him, thus I don't need to quarantine myself.
But actually I don't know about this till I went out for a drink with friends.
Don't worry, they are safe~! Hahahaha...

We chatted a lot tonight~
Till 3am?
Reached home at 3.30am like that..
Owh~ Luckily, my mom didn't scold me.. hahahaha..

I have some bad news with me.
But I'm not going to talk about it here because I have no idea how to solve it.
And of course, it is because of my family too.

Crystal, what happened huh?
I'm sorry that I can't with you when you need me.
Next time just text me, okay?

1st of July?
Have fun, yeah~
Chatting around with some friends which are not really close but actually closed before, aren't us?

Erm... friend.. friend.. friend.
Which part should I put all of you in my heart?
As a hi-bye friend or what? I have no idea again.

Why?
Because, for those who I really put in heart, has less communication with each other.
For those who I thought were hi-bye friends, they talk even more than a best friend to me.
What I gonna think? hmmm... have no idea~

Jac, I'm sorry to hear a bad news from you.
Be tough, and take care~

Have a nice day.

XOXO,

090630

Watched drama till 3am.
Hahaha.. Still not feeling sleepy at all.
What can I do?

The last day of June.
What am I gonna do?
Sleep till 2pm, start to watch drama again till midnight.
And then mom wake up and scold me..
Haha..just want me to sleep earlier.
I wish too but I can't fall asleep.

Feel boring at home, but I'm lazy to go out.
Um.. still got 3 presents have to buy..
Find some time to go out..

How come I forgot to buy the present when I was in Miri?
Never mind, I just find at Tawau, as long as i got buy~~ =)
Hehe.. Haven't got a plan yet.. >.^

Sleep sleep sleep~~
Goodnight, everyone.

Enjoy your day~ =)

XOXO,

090629

I met with MeeFong yesterday.
I never think that we have such a long time did not meet each other.
Hahaha.. glad that she has a great but busy life now.

My cousin back from Miri today.
Quite late, I know.
His choice to book the late tickets..

When we finally met with him around 1030pm, the waiter came and ask for the order.
He said: Liong Cha(Liang Teh).
Waiter: What kind of Liong Cha?
He blurred then said: Ha Fuo Chao.
Hahahahaha.. I laugh at him and said: You thought here is Miri huh?
Hahahaha... and he said: Ogui lor.. I used to it already..

Order for the food also the same.
He: Gan Lao Mian.
Waiter: What kind of Gan Lao Mian?
He: Em..
No more, then I think the waiter just simply gave him a gan lao mian... hahahaha..

Have a good day.

XOXO,

090628

I hope, I wish and I pray.
For every unlucky things.

I have a bible as my birthday present from my 2C2's friends, thanks.
But honestly, I haven't start to read yet.
I'm sorry.
I guess I need some time.

It's good for me, I know.
I will start reading it when I....
I still don't know when I will read it.. =)
I am seeing it now, it is like a holy thing that I should take it seriously.
Yea~ and I know I will in the future~

======================

Yesterday was the Golden Melody Awards.
What I wish to watch is actually just the performance of Super Junior!
Hahaha.. I'm sorry to other artists. lolx..
But one thing I was curious about is SungMin did not dance.
What happened huh?
Anyone can tell me?

They still that funny and look great.
Hsia and I were so excited for the performance..
Hahahaha.. glad that to watch their performance even they may not perform perfectly.

After their performance, I went to shower straight away.
Lolx.. And then did not back to the TV anymore.
Opps~ hahaha.. Sorry for the other performers..

Goodnightz everyone~

XOXO,

090627

Guess what did I do the whole day time?
Aha~ SLEEP.
Yea~ I bet you didn't read it wrongly unless you are blind.. XD

How could I slept for whole day?
Unbelievable? But it's true.
Because of Tawau's culture~!

Every Tawau people know the culture well.
No current - No Water - Streamyx Sucks.
No blamming~ We should love out culture.
And this culture caused me slept for whole day time.
Haha.. maybe I should find some meaningful things to do.. opps.. I missed the chance!

I don't really like today.(Basically, I should say yesterday because it's after 12am XD)
Just there are some troubles coming to me~!
And yet, I haven't found a way to solve it.
But actually, it can be solved by money.
I hate money in this situation~

Owh~
Bring a news for those who would like to study LAW.
Still wondering which university to choose huh?
Just choose Bond University~!
Huh? What? UK is better?
Let's click here..

The students from Bond University has just won the champion of ICC Trial Competition.
The team members also won the Best oralist & Best victims counsel.
What's this? Honestly, I have no idea.. haha..
I just know it is an international competition for Law Students.

In fact, I do not know whether I could upload these photos or not as they should have the copyright on these.
Hehe.. What if people sue me?
Oh no~ I just don't know credit to whom actually.. T.T
Please don't sue me.

What is the different between double major degree and double degree?
Don't tell me that just there an extra word which is MAJOR!
Sounds like having Double Degree is not bad huh?
But I know I'm not that genius to study double degree.
Take my time to study one by one~

When will H1N1 disappear?
Oh please pray to the God that the swine flu will be disappear as soon as possible.
You know what?
Singapore first 50 cases have been proved that even those who are not fever might also kena it.
What a scary news~ I thought fever will be a clearer symptom for us to differentiate the swine flu or normal flu, if not we are advised to have a self-isolation within 7 days once you have the symptom of swine flu.

Take care everyone.

XOXO,

090626

Sometimes I was thinking who creates LOVE.
Lolx.. Christian may say is God, Buddha says everyone has love, the Greek says there is Love God.. Hmmm who says there is a Pandora box?? I don't know..

One, two and three.
Relax and hear what your heart wants, that's all.
Follow the feeling will not wrong~
But make sure you can handle the outcome.

The situations might be complicated but I'm always here to support you all~!
I can be your listener; I can debate with you; I can analyse the situation for you!
Aha~ What I think is every problem will be solved if you have the confidence to do so.

Yeah~!
I am the consultant of the days~
It's great if I can help you all.
I'm sorry if my advises are not useful at all.

I think most of the Horoscope book(Do we call it a book? Whatever, I just call it as a book.) has mentioned about the Love of a Cancer.
Hahaha.. Should always know that I am a Cancer!
What mean? erm... Just find it bby yourself~

Have a nice day, to those who are having love problems.

XOXO,

090625

You know what?
Actually I have nothing to blog, but as Hsia warned me to update my blog always, okay~ I just update.. ^^

I stay at home whole day.
I have no place to go.. hmm.. actually there's a place -- Airport.
We have just decided not to go because it's really sad for us although she often leaves us.
Just feel so sad... I don't know why.

I called her just now.
Actually I wanted to text her but I think her phone has some problems that she can't receives my message.
I felt the sadness of course but I tried to not make myself cry..
Miss ya.. I miss you..
Wait me go to Perth and find you!!!

I forgot to buy your farewell present~
Sorry ya.. I don't mind to deliver to Perth if I could.. hahaha.. but obviously I couldn't.
So I just send to your house and ask your brother take for you ya!

(What if I tell you that my tears is dropping now huh? lolx)

============================

I think of the bbq night just now.
I really have a great time huh.. lolx..
And I watched the video that Kee uploaded in facebook, oh gosh~ really crazy huh?
But I love all of the smiles, the laughs..
You girls gave me a happy night~!
Miss you all..

XOXO,

090624

Yea~ back to Tawau already, finally.

Kinda busy after I back from Miri..
Toh is leaving at 10am later and I'm not going to send her..
I really scare that I will cry because I cried last time when they sent me.
Always miss ya.. I have a great time these days although quite tired for me.. hahaha

A bit missed the time in Miri.
Always ON for everything with Hsia, Kee and Crys.

Yesterday chat with Hsia, I don't even know that she reads my blog if she didn't tell me.. hahaha.
Nah~ Hsia, I am talking about you here...hahahaha.. (Don't wtf/wth/ngaiti/ngaisat there o.. kekeke)

Honestly, Hsia..
I don't know how to help you except chat with you.
What I think is really no one can help you except yourselves.
But I can give you all my time, for sport or shop or eat~ no problem!

Crys,
Take care of yourselves ya..
I will always be your listener when you need me..
Feel free to debate with me~~ hahahaha..

Eva,
It's first time I said this kind of things to you.
I didn't say the things you do was bad but I do not encourage you to do always.
Take care too ya..

YM,
I think I was the first time express my feeling to you so directly huh?
I feel good to have such conversation..
Doesn't mean that I'm unhappy with you, just expressed my feeling to you is great!
Argh~ I don't know how to say~!

I'm sleepy now~~
Goodnitez everyone..

XOXO, You know who am I.

090619

The last day stay at Miri for this semester.
Can't describe my feeling now..
Really feel like don't wanna leave now..

I have a great fun with my housemates these days..
Our craziness, happiness, loneliness shared with everyone of us..
Spamming the facebook, msn with each other although we are staying in the same house.. hahaha..

Studied at Coffee Beans.
Crazy shouting when stress in studying.
Chit-chatting in the living room.
Bought the Milk Tea and Donuts but then our fridge not enough space to put those drinks and donuts..lolx.
Went to Rexbox sang for whole night~ Hahahaha...
Cleaned our house for whole afternoon, everyone was so tired.. haha
Hosted a BBQ at our house~
Hsia's songs boomed our house.. hahaha..
I knew I'm quite crazy that night~~ hahaha...
And gave a surprised for my early birthday celebration.
Thanks all = Siew & Nyiam, Jac, Ching Yueh, Grace, Mich and my housemates = Crystal, Kee and Hsia~~
I'm glad to have you all in my life~!

Hsia left our house yesterday night.
She overnighted at her aunty house as she is leaving today back to Sarikei.
We are leaving tomorrow, the house left Kee alone as she gonna has her exam on Monday.
Pity Kee lives in the empty house~
Never mind, next semester we will having the same schedule already~~ lolx..

I miss you all.
I miss the everything we have done~!

Hey~ yo~ Hsia and Kee, my dearest housemates.. heheheHohoho~~ Crystal in!

Hahahaha... Kee, why you sit so far from me huh? Scare that I eat you huh?

You know what is Curi Makan?? hehe
Nah.. Busying prepare for the food~


It's my earlier Birthday Celebration as well as Jac's.. Happy Birthday Jac~!
Hahahaha... eating our cakes..

Owh~ Ching Yueh is not here, sad about that..

Hahaha.. BBQ members~~

Ls' House Members

Actually we want to pretend that we step on Mich's phone, but she took it away =.=
My presents, I like them very much, thanks ya..
12 different slides of Secret Recipe's cakes.. yummy~~

PS: More photo in my facebook~ Check it out~

090612

好像有點就沒有寫了。
我幹嘛去了？？

最近在考試。
考得好不好？？
坦白說，我覺得一點都不好。
我完全沒有讀書的心情，即使我知道我應該讀的。
都過去了，我只能祈禱。
每次都是後怕，我不懂能怎樣改掉我的坏習慣。

最近和housemates的關係更進了。
我喜歡這樣，像家人的感覺。
時不時突然說要吃Donuts或是喝珍珠奶茶，就真的跑下去買。
其實感覺還不賴~

第一次全家跑去Coffee Bean讀書。
哈哈……有一種很滿足的感覺。
當然，最重要的是我讀得進腦。

===================================

有人真正的了解自己嗎？
有時候我自己也會有不了解自己的時候。
當說著“我就是這樣的一個人”的這一句時，有一句話閃過我的腦海：我在拒絕改變。
或許是好的改變，也有可能是坏的改變。
是好是坏，我自己是分辨不出的，由你們來說給我聼。

我的世界裏常常只有我自己。
有人說我有時候說的話很深奧，我可能是說給你聼，但絕對也是說給我自己聼。
可以被拒絕，但我知道我接受就好了。

不想被傷害，就只能學著不在乎。
但，人與人之間的相處又怎能不在乎？
一門學問，我也還在學著。

我看過也聼過一句話：人的一生，只在于選擇。
選擇好的一方面還是坏的另一方面？

我不是一個樂觀的人，我承認。
但，我試著不讓悲傷太常停留在我生命裏。
可能有人會說這是一種自欺欺人吧？
誰說不是呢？
可是，至少我快樂的時間會比悲傷的時間來的多吧？

怎麽突然感慨了這麽多？
哈哈……我也不知道。
腦裏想了什麽，就打了什麽出來。

=====================================

20號快點到吧！！
我很想你們~！！
真的很想……

090524

天氣太悶熱，我沒有辦法集中精神讀書。
哈哈哈……又說我在找藉口了吧？
確實也是藉口啦~~
可是實在很熱哦~！！！

不讀書 ==> Fail
Fail ==> 錢飛走了~
不能讓這種事發生~~ 哈哈哈……

================================

最近愛上了這個人的歌聲。
實在，被迷惑了……
亦男亦女的聲音，太棒了~！
哈哈哈哈……加油~雖然你還是個新人。

090523

今天每個人都有戰利品……除了我…… T.T
實在哦~~ 哈哈哈哈…… 不過我也是開心啦~

之前每次都是買食物，今天真的逛得很開心。
不過也很累哦~~
累得我頭都開始痛了~~

還有~
謝謝Aubery買的Starbucks~~~
很好喝哦~~
越濃越好喝……
實在沒有選錯~！哈哈哈哈哈……

==================================

Happy Birthday to Jason Pang~ lolx..

090520

I have a lot of fun today~~lolx..

Early in the morning, we have Business Law seminar~
Result released, I failed for the current test.
I accepted easily because I knew the marking last night, so I have mentally prepared well .

And then, as usual we were having lecture there.
What so funny is they making fun on Crystal that saying she was pregnant..hahahahahaha...
Named the baby as Little Jojo or Little Hua Hua~~(Creating by using Joshua's name)

And then took lunch at Cafeteria.
Ogi keep playing gay with Alex.
That's really made a lot of fun..
Alex run away from us after he say:Nono.. I'm not gay. I'm straight!!
Hahahahahahaha... It's really funny..

After BIS lecture, we went to eat ABC~~
Spent by Alex, my BIS group leader~~
Thanks ya, Alex.

You know what?
There are only 2 girls among us.
Me and Crystal...
And what we feel is: This is my first time to accompany GUYS to shop around.. omg..
Hahahahha.. but have fun too..

After that, back to Senadin.
Took dinner at Grace there..
OMG~ left a lot of VEGETABLES for me???
But I finished it although it's really disgusting for me..
I need to think for my health..

===============================

As what KetHung said: He will keep silent and ask Why So Serious..
Hahaha.. but I told my friend yesterday that I did not mean to say any other meaning~ and don't misunderstand my words..
What I think is: Is it we have a long period didn't contact with each other till she doesn't know my current personality already??

Hmmm... Maybe I always make fun on her during our secondary school..
Hahahaha.. but I really think your name is good enough, really no other meaning, ok??

Luckily, she accepted my explanation that I really do not mean that~
Hehehehe.. Hope to see you but I guess will only see you when both of us are in holiday and at Tawau, right?

====================================

My final exam is coming soon.
And my friends are having their A-Level exam now..
Till 2 June is it??
I forgot already..
Hahahaha.. sorry~~
Just can say: Work hard together ya~! ^^V

090519

今天算了電費。
哈哈哈……比上個月要多還一倍。
結果，每個人的反應都很可愛。
要解釋説是上個月的天氣太熱了，不能不開冷氣。
不開的話，等著中暑，然後送醫院……
哈哈哈哈……很像是很心虛的解釋哦~！

=======================================

考試要到了。
心情有點緊張……
會怕怕啦~真的！

=======================================

有時候看看虐文其實也不錯。
至少會感覺到心疼……
不要說我有變態的傾向，沒事去虐待自己的心。
哈哈…… 不懂了~
只是覺得虐了，才會找到珍惜的感覺。

虐==〉心疼==〉在乎==〉珍惜
是這樣嗎？

=========================================

I was thinking am I too not serious in my life?
When I was serious in particular thing, there were some thinking that I was joking or saying something in other meaning.
When I was joking, there were some thinking that I was saying in a serious way..
Oh gosh~!
What should I do then?
Change to be serious all the time?
Or joking all the time?
Or silent always?
Choose for me then..

090518

剛剛回來。
吃得好飽，看得很爽~

一部戯的成功在於能讓觀衆的情緒跟著它起起落落。
這部電影成功了（或許是我自己投入了啦~）。

起初還有點覺得選錯戲，有點後悔的感覺。
可是越看下去就不自覺的緊張起來，啊~還會“Oh no”來“oh no”去……哈哈哈哈……
看看下~不錯啦！！

本來我們打算看“Angels and Demons”的。
可是Dan Brown所寫的書，幾乎都是與宗教有關。
Eileen是虔誠的基督徒，不想勉強她看這類戲，所以改看“Star Trek”。

其實，換作以前，或許我會很想看Dan Brown的書。
可是現在，感覺有點恐怖。
真想不起以前我是怎樣把“達文西密碼”看完的，而且還覺得很好看。
可能是因爲那時沒有真正了解基督吧~

雖然現在也沒有很了解，可是至少不想去offense祂。
也不是說以前會想要Offense，只是以前看的時候，會不知覺的贊同。
所以，有點煩惱要不要看Angels and Demons。
不過，我會比較想看“數字城堡”，應該會不錯，因爲我看了三章~ 嘻嘻嘻嘻……

有時閒的話，讀一下：
http://www.bliayad.org/articles/pages/0015.htm

090516：我的巨蟹座

從Jac那裏偷來的~~ 慢慢看~~~ 嘻嘻

巨蟹座
巨蟹是心软的，容易被感动，即使表面看起来总是有一副硬硬的壳，但那壳子底下是一颗柔软敏感到极至的内心。它们面对一份感情是犹豫再三的，不要说它们懦弱，它们只是明白自己是容易受伤的。他们对感情抱有信仰，相信纯真、相信天长地久，所以有时是挑剔的。

这是一层表面坚硬的壳，其实攻克轻而易举，因为蟹蟹有一颗柔软的心。

蟹蟹恋爱了，这时的它们变的很粘人，很婆妈，因为你是它的中心，它会为你考虑很多，饭吃了吗？天气会变了吗？记得带伞哦！路上车多，慢点走哦！……..诸如此类！

蟹蟹是深情而痴情的，爱上一个人会爱的很深，即使明知道没有结果也很难自拔。这是巨蟹的一种固执，想要得到的东西，往往不会轻易放手。有时，一段没有结果的恋情会成为蟹蟹的生活重心。这无疑是痛苦的，但又难以自拔。然而，巨蟹的不安全感又在内心大叫着放弃，所以这时的蟹蟹总是在坚持和放弃的巨大矛盾中苦苦煎熬着。学会放弃是蟹蟹的一门功课.

当然，如果蟹蟹真的决定放弃了，它的坚决会让所有人吃惊。
要记住：除了你自己，没有人可以伤害到你
蟹子是痴情的，但又不善于表达，面对自己心爱的人拘谨、放不开。它们的幽默感此刻变得生涩。
蟹子是深情的，但又不善于把握，为什么一次次控制不住自己的情绪，说出明知不该讲的话？

分裂而善于幻想的寄居蟹在说巨蟹之前，先说说几个一直以来欣赏的几个偶像，他们都不同，但他们有一个共同点，就是，他们都是巨蟹男。周星驰，王家卫，罗大佑，李宗盛，梁朝伟，张学友……一般在每次排行榜中总是靠末的巨蟹们，看起来并没有很明显的个性，但是，他们在艺术方面的直觉和敏锐却是别人难以匹敌，从这几个人名里就不难看出。他们在生活中都是温文尔雅的，被动的，甚至往往是沉默的，但是在他们的电影，歌曲中，却展露出令人惊异的才华，让我们总是不由自主的为之倾倒。当周星驰让我们笑得泪水横流的时候，我们也早听闻其实戏外的他认真严肃，不苟言笑，对待朋友和情人都很苛刻；我们知道在戏里演什么都神形毕似的影帝梁朝伟同性格南辕北辙的射手刘嘉玲20多年同居，至今都不愿结婚，他总是说，其实他的人生就是在戏里；我们知道张学友出道前曾经是黑社会的小混混，天天宿醉，自暴自弃，也看到张学友成名后依然为了家庭拼命打拼，几近崩溃……

　　这就是巨蟹，其实，最能说明巨蟹特质的，就是－－分裂无论是哪一种蟹，他们都有着分裂的思想。他们渴望安定，也渴望出人头地，他们内心充满艺术的灵感，夸张的幻象，但是在现实生活中，他们总是低眉顺眼，很难真正展露心中的狂想。所以在艺术的舞台上，他们反而得以施展，让心中奇异的狂想放大到极致，他们可以将任何一首歌一个角色演绎的入木三分，所有来自于生活中被动的接受，在艺术的殿堂上得到了最好的宣泄，所以巨蟹真的应该属于舞台。即使没有好的歌喉没有好的外形，但是他们有良好的感受力和表现力，他们的性格实际上更像是一只寄居蟹，在真正自我的生活中，他们常常将自己包裹的很紧，但在诠释和演绎别人的时候，他们那内心的感情得到了释放。

　　巨蟹座的另一个长处是他们有着哲学的思考力世界因两股力量相互消长，而水象就是典型的阴柔之力。水象星座的人有一种天生的宇宙观，巨蟹也是如此，加之他们天生有母爱的情结，所以他们的思考往往带有着人性化的关怀。所以从事与艺术相关的行业的巨蟹，无论如何都可以算是幸运的巨蟹，因为能够得以发挥天然的性格所长。但是不是每个巨蟹都有这样的机会，所以大多数巨蟹都会感到自己的压抑和痛苦。他们不是没有渴望，相反他们需求很多，渴望很多，但是他们总是躲在自己的壳里做着各式各样的幻梦，只是在想，很少实施。所以如果你看到的总是低眉顺眼的巨蟹实际上并不是真正的巨蟹。那只是巨蟹的一个假象。

　　永远无法抹去的自卑巨蟹们其实是自我感觉很好的心高气傲的一群人，但是却又难以克服时时刻刻想躲进壳里的自卑感。他们天生多疑和敏感，碰到困难，就先躲进壳里，自欺欺人，在梦中编织自我的安全感，而从来没有想到如何主动将危机转化为机遇。他们对待困难的消极方式，使他们总很难真正木秀于林，他们总在捕捉他们认为最好的时机，但是那个时机却总是无法到来，其实世间哪有万全之策？当蟹蟹们艰苦的自我互博之时，大好时机已经失去。但是要改变这种天生的自卑感确乎很难，蟹蟹们几乎完全不由自主。
怀旧是巨蟹们的人生主旋律巨蟹们非常怀旧。他们喜欢旧东西，怀恋旧感情，对家庭有着天然的眷恋。泛黄的相片，褪色的丝带，尘封的梳妆台……所有一切带有浪漫情调的旧物，都可以让他们独自神伤，黯然追想，他们总是沉浸在过去的回忆里，永远记得年少时的孤寂敏感，永远记得初恋情人，多年后仍然四处找寻初恋情人的消息，慰籍多年来始终保持新鲜的记忆。所以王家卫的电影总喜欢用这样的句式开头：多年以后……

　　忽冷忽热患得患失的爱情他们天生悲观，永远需要多一点，更多一点的安全感。为什么他们如此需要安全感，因为他们天生就没有安全感，所以他们是很容易恐慌的，所以他们也就变得非常的多疑和猜忌。爱上一个巨蟹是要仔细思量的，因为他们会突然忽冷忽热，突然置之不理，突然恶言相向，但是其实他们并非不爱你，他们有时候是在跟自己呕气。他们渴望天天24小时同你粘在一起，他们对爱人有着强烈的占有欲，恨不得掏心掏肺给你，他们关注你的点点滴滴，小到为你买一支发卡，大到帮你选择哪路公车……他们都费劲心思，他们时时刻刻每件事都为你考量，但又因为付出的不停增加而变得越来越担心害怕，会不会得不到对等的爱。所以他们会突然变得冷淡了，也许只因为你一个眼神，他们就觉得你已经不如从前，于是开始无休止的试探，他们说话总是转弯抹角，但是却总希望你永远清晰表态，假设某天你也含糊了一下，那就完了，蟹蟹们立刻条件反射的开始惴想出无数个虚拟场景，在无尽的悲观中，意淫出种种悲惨场面，然后再见你时，就已经是冷口冷面，甚至说出无比绝情的话语－－所以，你和巨蟹的他们，是要努力去磨合的，给他们足够的信赖和安全，他们回馈你的，绝对让你感动的热泪盈眶。

　　虚伪包装下易感的心实际上巨蟹善于伪装。他们喜欢笑，无论何时何地，他们常常微笑，也许这笑容有时候让人欣慰，但有时候却会让人感到非常的虚伪。当然巨蟹们也总有自己的小奸小坏，但是他们虚伪的前提却总是先为了保护自己。他们对自己应得的利益是淄铢必较，有时候会让人感到他们是不是很小心眼，但是，在朋友聚会等场合上，他们又绝对是豪爽大方，主动抢着付账的人。所以其实巨蟹是个公私概念很明确的人，他们对该得的绝对毫不客气，而对待朋友，他们又觉得其实这点钱根本不算什么。他们是眷恋朋友和家人的，他们基本都有些喜欢酒。而且酒量都还不错，因为他们眷恋那种宾客相尽欢的气氛，更眷恋着家的和乐融洽之感。所以巨蟹们喜欢做饭，即使不会做饭也对美食有天然偏爱，他们懂得享受居家生活，所以巨蟹们有个理想婚姻是最快乐的事情。问题是巨蟹们却常常选择晚婚或不结婚，因为他们多疑又害怕，他们总是对新幻境充满怀疑，对新的家庭又向往又拒绝，在自我矛盾中，不断蹉跎了年华。

　　自己为自己创造安定感觉巨蟹们总是不安，这是一种不好的感觉，因为如此，许多巨蟹枉然蹉跎，终日郁郁。其实，巨蟹们可以尝试自己为自己创造安定的感觉。找一个家里人都喜欢的对象，建立一个自己的家，也许巨蟹会发现自己会变得安稳很多。找个摩羯是比较理想的选择。或者找一个自己的爱好，倾注所有的心血，自己也会变得安定很多。当然蟹蟹们也许会说，你这是站着说话不腰疼啊，要是那么容易的话，还用得着你说吗？呵。但是，无论怎样，当我们自己意识到自己的不安，就该努力去克服他，其实壳外的世界，没有那么可怕，这是真的。

　　总的说来，巨蟹们很可爱，尤其是在艺术上有成就的那些人，他们创造的都是令人仰止的丰碑，所以巨蟹们不必没来由自卑，其实你们都很出色。

====================================

對有些點，真的很認同。
沒辦法不認同啊~
自己就是巨蟹~
哈哈哈哈……

你們眼中的我，像巨蟹座嗎？？

090515：It's You~!

Drama Version


Dance Version


I like this song very much~!

090513

Oh My God~!!!
My house's grass burnt just now~!!
And then the whole house only left Crystal and me.

I have no idea why the grass will get burnt..
Probably is someone smoke and throw the stub into my grass field!

Aiks~ Make me gonna bath once again~
Why? Because I be the firefighter just now~
Wa~~~~ So brave right??
Hahahahaha.... I feel so funny also..
Luckily the fire is not so strong~ if not i need to call to the real firefighter~
So scary actually~~

I took this photo on 14.05.. lolx...

090512

Happy Birthday to KahYee & Vui Hiung..

I have done nothing today~
Management almost done~
Waiting Ivy to check for it~
Accounting, so tired to do it...

=.=

090511

要上課的壓力大，結果害我睡不好……
很累地去上課~ 結果恍神恍得厲害……

在空檔的時間，我在圖書館玩Sudouku。
哈哈哈……花了很長的一段時間還沒有解決它！

然後，聽到Crystal他們說今晚去Ah Wong家做BIS。
哈哈……硬坳著要去~
沒有去過嘛~ ^^
可是他們一直逼我搞自閉~ 哈哈哈哈哈……

可是最後都是沒有去啦~
不是被拒絕而不能去，而是因爲他家裏有Party哇~
就不方便咯~
最後在我們家做了。

整個過程真的是可以笑死我！
那麽認真的功課變成那麽好笑，我真的沒力！！！

結果，我睡着了，他們都還沒有做好~
兩點才離開吧~如果沒有錯！
哈哈哈……BoonBoon那麽遲睡，你OK嗎？？ 嘻嘻嘻嘻……

Ah Wong趁我睡覺的時候去打包吃的，看到我剛好開眼睛還和我說：“耶？這個睡覺，省錢了~哈哈哈”
可是後來還是有問我要吃什麽啦~
可是我要睡覺，和他說不用了……哈哈……

090510

今天的精神比較好~

早上八點，薇載我們去教會。
噢~有點嚇倒……KetHung居然也去？
哈哈哈哈……Eileen也太厲害了吧？？

其實自己會慢慢開始喜歡去了吧？
對我而言是百利而無一害的，雖然這是不能以利益來計算，可是說真的，對我自己是有好處的。

結束之後，我跑去薇家做功課。（美為其名——做功課…哈哈哈哈哈……）
其實是真的要做的，可是看到床，我就昏昏慾睡……哈哈哈哈……
睡到BoonBoon來，大概睡了一個多小時吧~ 哈哈哈……

後來就有做功課啦~
雖然不多，可是資料收得七七八八……

回家的時候~
哈哈……我駕BoonBoon的車~
很爽一下，很久沒有駕車了嘛~

駕BoonBoon車的結果就是我的電話掉在她的車上。
還我緊張得半死（其實沒有到一半啦~）。
雖然一開始有覺得會不會不見了，可是就是有一種它沒有不見的感覺，所以就沒有那麽緊張啦！

好吧~
BoonBoon說找到了！ 哈哈哈哈……

090509

今天不知是不是我的衰日~
本來要下Town，結果Curtin Bus早走。

本來要去Kelvin剪頭髮，結果関了。
跑去Alan那邊見~算了吧~下次不要在那裏見了！！

然後回家。
準備晚餐……

六點。
Ah Wong他們到了。
Crystal和他們一起去文萊。
我沒得去……因爲我沒有帶我的國際護照。
看著他們走的時候，心裏真的有沉了一下。

七點。
晚餐時間。
Mich和秀沒有來吃。
都是爲了BIS Assignment在忙。

九點。
去查考試時間表。
開始想要怎樣開始復習。
另外，發現BB有Task Four 的Guidance…… =.=

十一點半。
Crystal他們回來了。
有很好的回憶，可惜我不在裏面。
是有那麽一點傷心，可是這是沒辦法的事。
下次吧~下次，我一定和你們一起去！！！

十二點半。
吃了他們打包給我的壽司， 太飽~睡不着。
（不小心忘了拍照……哈哈哈哈哈哈……）

明天早上去教堂，早醒早醒~~~

090508

怎麽五月好像過得好慢？？
很想六月快點來……我的假期~~~~

唉~今天大家都很像沒有心情~
不懂啦~

我今天看了一整天的戲~
看了Dragon Ball~ 新加坡紅星大獎2009~StarKing~

看StarKing，笑死我！
這一集真的好好笑哦~！
爽了！嘻嘻嘻嘻……

看了那個頒獎典禮，我真的覺得有好多好戲要看哦！
小娘惹、黃金路、不凡的愛、雙子星等~
可是，我的電腦沒位子啦~！！！

有時候真的覺得新加坡藝人不得了。
爲什麽？
藝人，一定就會比較，然後就一定會有紛爭。
可是，這些很難在新加坡演藝圈看到的。
連狗仔都沒有~
大家都和平相處……
就像阮經天說的一樣，他們很像一家人。
好事來的~
至少不會閙得你死我活的局面，大家又能拍好的作品出來。

每次看紅星大獎，都會有一幕感動自己。
有一次是葛米星，這一次是周初明。
還有李銘順大方地說出找到了一個未來老婆~哈哈哈哈……

祝福他們每一個。

090507

今天跑去看牙醫。
我想知道我能不能“綁牙”。
結果，牙醫Fully Booked~~
差點在等Eileen的時候睡着了~ 哈哈哈哈……

回家的路上，Taxi Uncle很好笑哦~
他說他要去載另外兩個人去另一個地方，問我們能不能在Boulevard逛一下~
我們沒趕時間，所以也沒關係，就去逛逛了~
買了一雙拖鞋，一些吃的和一杯奶茶。

秀她們來吃飯的時候，哇靠~居然去跑步沒有叫我？？？！！
哈哈哈哈哈哈……被人反唇相譏：“去Town沒有叫我們hor~”
嘻嘻嘻嘻…… 我又不是特地去的，是uncle要載我們去的。

Yeah~！
明天跑步……
最近要鍛煉體能~
爲了六月去Rainforest~~~~
加油加油！！

========================

今天看了“大喜事”。
可能因爲是范文芳和李銘順主演的關係，所以我很喜歡這部戯。
當然，内容其實還算不錯啦~
很好笑一下~~~